Shattering Illusions
by Fangirlno.90463
Summary: He was the very definition of undefined. LavixRoad


**Heyy everybody! I just woke up this morning and decided to find a weird D-gray man couple and write an angsty one-shot. My first one-shot! **

**Hurray! XD!**

**I hope you all like it, and I haven't seen too many fics about this couple around, so I decided I'd write one. Even though I just adore Road and Allen, even more so when they're in love, I wanted to do something different. So I hope you guys enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own D-gray man or any associated characters and settings**

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His was a mind that contained myrid of contrasting concepts.

He wanted one thing, but had been taught to want another. A boy of forty-nine different identities. Forty-nine different sets of fear which somehow seemed to be one and the same. Abandonment, loss, longing. Road sneered, so disgustingly weak. It was fascinating though. Looking into his mind was like looking into a gallery; a hall hung with portraits of the same person portrayed in different worlds. Or was it the person that was changing, and the world that was staying the same?

It didn't really matter in the end. He was breaking apart in front of her and she was reveling in his fragility.

But still, if he has so many names, Road mused, has he forgotten his real one? She didn't know. So she twirled a candle in her hand and drove it into the cracking frame that was his hole-ridden mind. Road never had been one to let go of things once she had them. Even if they didn't think they'd been had.

"GET OUT!"

His was a mind not yet broken, it appeared.

Road felt a smirk curl her small mouth upwards. Useless, or perhaps futile, was the word that came to mind. She crossed her legs languidly, resting a pointed chin on tiny hands. There were none of his precious friends to help him this time. He had to win free of her on his own. Her sudden laugh, too high and sweet to be anything more than the innocent mirth of a child, cut the air.

Escape her once, darling, you don't escape her again.

The only one to have ever escaped once, actually. Road tilted her head. Perhaps she didn't want to snap his mind just yet. She released her hold, and the force sent him from his tired feet to his knees.

"Poor little thing . . . so confused, aren't you?"

She landed in front of him soundlessly, and was met with a glare. She pursed her lips.

Exhausted, defiant and just _so_ pathetically human.

She took another step closer, then another. He could do nothing to stop her, yet she saw him prepare for the worst. Road sneered. If she wanted him dead she'd kill him and be done with it. So silly, thinking they could fight back at all, really.

"What are you doing?"

His voice was hoarse and Road wondered if maybe he'd been screaming while she was distracted. She smiled at him vaguely, giving him an answer that wasn't to the question he'd asked.

"I want you to break. But maybe not today."

She stopped directly in front of him, close enough to feel the heat of his body, and the brush of his hanging hair against her arm. Even standing while he kneeled, she was barely taller. She bent down until they were level, and decided that he really could be just as pretty as her Allen, with his pretty green eyes filled with knowledge and ignorance in equal measure, his pretty red hair, maybe his pretty insanity, too.

And he really was going just the tiniest bit crazy, Road thought. It hard enough for humans to stay sane as one person, let alone forty-nine.

He continued to glare back at her, lips turned into a grimace, and suddenly, Road decided her fun today would be complete if she could taste them.

Road had found you can tell much of a person from their kiss.

As she expected for some unnameble reason, he did not fight her. For a moment she still deigned to wonder why. When desperate hands reached up to clutch her to a shaking body, perhaps she got her answer, if she even needed it to begin with. Road hummed against his mouth, hands still holding his head in place. It was the same and so very different to kissing her Allen.

Allen was broken too, but he knew who he was. Allen would not have responded, or grasped onto her like she was his lifeline. Because Allen was all determination, despair and hope.

The Bookman-to-be was desperation. For what she could not tell, but why was easier answered. He doesn't know what he wants, she sighed. He doesn't know what to think. Allen was most definitely broken, in some way, and maybe so was the boy (technically he was still a boy, even if his childhood had been lost in struggle) before her now.

But he was also completely and utterly . . . lost in himself.

Road released him and looked into a tormented mind and decided that she liked this one as well. Human torment was oh so very interesting. Even more so within the exorcists; humanity's sacrificial lambs. With a sinister smile, she stroked his cheek and laughed at his defeat.

Then she was gone.

Fading into shadows, Road watched her latest facination run to the aid of his friends without hindrance.

Afterall, playing with a broken toy was fun, but searching for a _lost_ toy was . . .

Addictive.

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><p><strong>Well, how was it? If you guys liked, please drop me a review!<strong>

**I hope I got Road's character right. I absolutely love her as a character and I didn't want to mess that up. It was mainly Road centric, but I hope you liked my potrayal of Lavi too (weird couple, I know).**

**Until next time, please review! :)**


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